Films > Film Reviews
Creature From The Black Lagoon (in 3D)
Cinema City
27/11/16
Ever since Halloween, Cinema City has been running a season of Universal horror movies. And by that I mean legendary monster movies from Universal Studios, not movies about things that frighten literally everyone, like dropping your iPhone down a drain, or losing your car park ticket at the mall. As such, I jumped at the chance to see a bona fide classic - 1954’s Creature from the Black Lagoon - resurrected onto the big screen. And not just resurrected, but brought back to life in glorious stereoscopic 3D (that’s the new sort where you all look like the Blues Brothers, not the old sort where you all look like that one bad guy from Back to the Future). Splendid.
For those of you who have never seen it, CftBL is the story of a group of scientists who travel up the Amazon searching for prehistoric fossils, whereupon they accidentally discover something strange living up-river. That’s right – it’s the creature from the title; an amphibious “gill-man” who, for thousands of years, has been happily chilling on his tod, until suddenly this boat full of entitled white people rocks up disturbing his off-grid paradise. He’s about to go and have a word about the noise, when he spots something else he’s never seen before – a woman. Yup, turns out that he may be a few steps further down the evolutionary ladder than the rest of us, but ol’ Gilly just wants the same thing as everyone else – to stick his fishy dick in something that revs his outboard motor. Handily the scientist’s boat gets stuck, which gives Gill the perfect opportunity to kidnap the object of his affection (standard courting practice in the ‘50s, so I’m informed). Don’t start hating too badly on our web-toed lothario though, because upon realising that he has a cod-on for the only female member of the expedition, the other scientists (one of whom is her fucking fiancé) happily decide to use her as bait to try and reel in the slimy seducer. Jesus, talk about getting what you deserve.
As you can probably tell by now, there are some parts of this movie, such as the belittling of the female character and the racially dubious treatment of the local help, that have aged more like a half-full open tin of baked beans left at the back of a crowded fridge, rather than a fine wine. It does seem rather churlish, however, to start picking on a 60 year old movie for the attitudes of its time, especially when this adds somewhat of a retrospectively ironic humour to the proceedings, so let’s look at what it still has to offer. You know the really scary bit in Jaws? Y’know, the bit where everyone is pissing about in the sea, having a right old laugh, and then the camera goes under water, and you see what’s lurking under them, and you know that someone’s about to get fucked up, but the people are all unaware and just splashing each other and shit? Yeah, well whilst I’m not taking anything away from Spielberg, I guarantee you he saw this movie. In fact, the scene where Julie Adams decides to go swimming in the lagoon unaware of the creature, is probably more effective, given the lighting and contrast of a black-and-white movie. It might be more difficult now to see how this movie terrified an audience back in its day, but there are still moments that can hush a modern-day audience with suspense.
So, if you, like me, are a fan of the history of film, and you ever get the chance to watch this movie, you owe it to yourself to do so, as it’s clearly since been used as a template for some of the most effective scary movies ever. Laugh at the bits that are silly, then marvel at the bits that still make you sit towards (if not quite on) the edge of your seat. Oh yeah, and as the original was designed for the 3D technology of the day, this element still works fantastically, with people waving bloody harpoon guns in your face, and reaching out of the screen trying to stick their watery fingers in your popcorn. A wet and wonderful expedition into the murky, swampy depths of horror cinema’s past.
8/10